Steven Lim哥哥说食色性也 只要你是人你都会色！

可爱小孩与量体重机， 男女平等！

你会问 “哥哥，为何这个话题？“ 因为我再也看不下去了！ 有人说，男人不用爱就可以性。

女人要有爱才可以性。。我说不如放屁更好！更本就是bullshit（屁话）。 我认为男人和

女人都一样的，都有幻想能力。想吃，想睡，想和谁拥抱，缠绵等等。。唯有不同的事，

女人和男人身体不一样。可是可以却定的是我们都是一男一女在一个肉体博斗的时刻所生

的。性和食物一样。。被Marketing理论视为必需品（Needs)。无论男女，看到美食， 饥

饿的时后，都可能留口水，幻想要吃它的感想。你可以选者张大嘴流口水或保持仪态猛吞口

水。这跟性需要相像， 食色性也。

现在有一些女生开始不在像从前一样了， 开始玩一夜情， 换男友好像换轮胎一样，有的

还比男生还快。不用找，电视机也能看到咯。。全世界的法律似乎都还保互女性和老人。女性

都有可能可被告强奸非礼呀！以体形来看，女人强奸男的很不划算， 可能被扁一吨， 很难得逞，如果那男的真的不想要。。但如果男

的被处在落势。。那可就遭了！新闻报道过，女护士强奸男植物人。。好淫陷哦！！更离谱的事是女佣强奸婴儿， 害到鸡鸡变形。父母

报警！这就是人，一样会大小便，一样会放屁，会有冲动的时候，有一样的行为和反应。

但女人都瘾藏得好好，比较含蓄。。。以前的我以为男人都比较容易使坏。后来，看多了，女生还不是一个模式！我噌被２不同

女友说她想强奸我。。。妈的！这种话我自己都从没和任何女友说过。多莫不好意思啊！她能讲出来，代表我的推理是对的。。说到

拍照，有时候还是女生提议想拍我的哦。不要吓到！还有一次我在我最爱的前女友的电脑里面找到Keanu Reeves 的照片。 照片旁边

有个奇怪东西！ 放大后原来是男的鸡鸡！既贴既除的鸡鸡！ 她想收这个干嘛？？！填补寂寞？ 所以我们不能全都怪陈冠希拍照。

一个巴掌是打不响的　１。多数她们是自愿被拍的。  ２。Ｗｈｏ　ｋｎｏｗｓ她们也有可能拍回。。只是问题被坏人搞到这莫大。

陈冠希好可怜哦，因为是男的被骂臭到臭头。在此，我提倡男女平等，谁都不能给占优势。　我希望冠希的戏份不要被删掉。我觉

得Ｅｄｉｓｏｎ会是卖点！删掉等于把免费宣传丢掉地！好傻。。。。

情人节快乐！！ Steven Lim哥哥恭祝个界永结同心！

二月 11日  2008

无论你们在和处，新加坡的Steven Lim 哥哥永远爱你！

图为专业射影师替美女录影。她好会摆pose哦！比我利害塞利！

非常的开心！ 昨天我的聊天室来了很多中港台马的

支持者！他们都看了我支持 Edison及受害者的屏视。真

的非常开心。第一次有了海外的粉丝非常的意外！你们一

定要挺我到底哦。。所以，这个日记是写给你们的！你们

好友善，让我感动！

我希望你们在我的频视里能找到我要传给你们的讯

息！ 我没有鼓励任何人自拍裸照！！ 但我不容须任何人

欺负落难的人。。应该保护受害者才对阿！·而不是落井

下石的。  但不要无端端没经过友的同意就自拍啦！哈

哈！人就是那莫的奇怪。喜欢拍照留念记忆。最后记忆被

人发现，记忆被人传播。。糟了。。！ 这次掺了。。谁都不希望的！警察叔叔也来了。。部长伯伯也慌了。抓到6 个， 原来

还有Kira..不知道Kira 后面还有没有Sarah， 没完没了。新的照片不断发出，每个女人都心惶惶，不懂谁是下一部戏的女主

角。。比幸运抽奖还刺激哪！抽完不用紧，还被抽中多一次！老天啊！就放过他们吧。。。

感谢中港台马新的传媒报道及各大论坛能给我3分钟的时发表我的意见和看法！谢谢天涯，谢谢香港高登的朋友！谢谢中国新

浪！ 当我在52频道的台湾电视新闻看到我的时候，我妈吓了一跳！ 我也跳了两下。。差点滑倒。我没恶意，不想害任何人，

只希望用我的方式帮助受害者度过难关。。很高兴能做你们的朋友和支持。。感恩。。我们都是华人！ 

03th February 2008

Beauty lies on the eyes of the beholders! My "live" cam chat fan says I m hotter than Vincent Ng!

Real evidence from my blog "live" web cam chat!

In case some of you never know, I have recently installed a webcam and a paid chatroom facilities in my blog.  The chatroom is 24 hrs.  For the "live" webcam, I will on my cam most of the time.  You could see me when i just woke up with my pyjamas, eating food, sipping soya bean milk, yawning, sneezing, reading newspaper, exercising and even when i m sleeping!  Guess not many Singaporeans dare to do that.  I m proud that perhaps, i may be the first Singapore blogger who has installed a webcam in his own blog to interact with his readers n supporters. Anyone can type anything in the chatroom. Having supporters are great!  They worshipped u like above and the feeling is great having somebody who likes ur videos n even the blog entries i have written. And even when i jokingly asked "Who is more hot? Me or Vincent Ng (TV actor)?" My supporters will surely say it is me, just to perhaps flatter me abit or make me happy.  Yup, Vincent is a good looker with a very defined body.  This i will totally put my hands up. But, I m definitely taller n bigger sized than him at 85kg.  Still can fight rite??  N i dun think I m that very ugly.  The pic above so nice rite???  Some people asked me why i dare to call myself the most handsome guy, must be so vain n super ego or super BHB.  Wrong Wrong Wrong! I believe a tagline/ title of website must be unique n differentiating from the rest of the blogs.  Guess it is working quite well.  Some of the bloggers interestingly wrote about me as the most handsome guy in the world. Eg.  You know that Steven Lim, the most handsome guy in the world lor ( in sarcastic tone) ..they will say....so funny!  I met some nice people in my live chat room.  Some really gave me really good advises n bring me smiles when i need one.  You know, people, supporters give u the extra mileage n reasons to carry on with life.  One day if i die, I hope that the chatters that i have chatted before will come visit my funeral n send me goodbye.  Done nothing really fantastic in my life.  Screwed up some great  n my biggest chances a couple of years ago.  Think of it, i still feel so hard to bear.   And I felt really disappointed with the Commercial Affairs Department for investigating in an innovative and unconventional company (X Pte Ltd) that is doing so well without any formal consumers complaints on the company but only queries.  Till now after so many months, no news...  Now the 1st issue is,  they have extended the investigating period again.  I dun think this is the most appropriate thing to do to any companies in the world.  Imagine, a person opens a business who is doing so well, other people jealous, then the police come in and check.  The newspapers then do big coverage on the investigation.  How will it affect the company???  2nd issue.  Till now I and my friend are still using the excellent product provided by the company.  Why i say excellent because it is really excellent!  Imagine i give u 2000 mins plus local outgoing calls per month. You can even use the call system to call most of the places in the world! then the 2000 plus mins will be auto converted to the remaining call time you have for that country you are calling at no extra charges.  So good rite!!!  I sweared that it is so good that I even downgrade my original phone plan to a much lower phone plan to fully utilize the calling system.  Trust me.   My phone bill immediately cut by half.  Now, tell me, who says they dun have a real product?!  Can the CAD actually use the product to prove that me, as a end user of the product is not lying? I certainly believe CAD's true intention is trying to protect the consumers' interest.  This is a very noble task! Ya, but what about those who had already bought the products?  We are also consumers you know?  Refund to me is nothing.  I joined the company not just to get any refunds.  It is because i really voluntarily believe in the company and know i can derived great benefits from it.  NO ONE CAN FORCE ME TO JOIN A COMPANY!  But all I can say, all things look so well n blossoming for the company till the CAD came in.  A humble question to those officers that work in CAD, if i offer you $1000 monthly salary to do the things you are doing now, is money or salary an important factor to you?  Disclaimer:  All i say above is a genuine personal feedback about wat i feel and I do not represent any companies.   Cos I cannot believe I can be so unfortunate.  This kind of things can happen to me again and again...Buy this scheme, CAD come in.....Buy shares , stock market crashes...Shares I have buy left only about half the price...Damn sway lor..!  I really hope the CAD can come to a conclusion real soon and clear everyone's doubts including the reporters' be it good or bad.  I read forums about people which are not in the company making false accusations the company is scamming, even before the CAD reveal any formal investigation reports/ findings.  Why we never stop these people from doing so? Justice is great! One of my childhood dreams is to join the police force to catch the baddies and i personally salute all the police officers (uniformed or non) for their selfless dedications to uphold nation's peace and justice.  Thank you, SPF!

24th January 2008

Wanting to get married or want to remain single for life?

Pic on right shows two young lads finally got married, priest also glee with joy!

See this couple at a wedding ceremoney...it is called you may kiss the bride. But the touching part about this wedding is when the priest said you may kiss the bride, the bride rushed to kiss the groom instead, very very affectionately. The guy's neck almost break by this generous move. People, this is love.  You do not need to let the guy tell u he loves you first.  If you really love him, nothing is gonna hold u back!  He is the guy that u decide to marry.  He is there. On your mark, get set, go rush to him right now before "He" disappeared again once more.  You see the priest are both touched n happy for the just married.  Wonder how many times he had done this sacred task already.  Our heavenly fathers above witnessed the joint of two different entities, bonded them together for life, two hearts beating as one.  I went back to reservist recently. most of my army mates all are married.  Some even brings very adorable kids to run around in the final parade with have.  I feel so startled at times.  "Are you married? kids?" I will ask them. Some will proudly say yes, " 3 years old already!"  Then, i realized I m 32 this year.... Damn! Super old sia..... Done nothing great in my life so far.  Rather keep disappointing my family n friends again and again.  N of cos, not super poor....but i always have dreams of retiring early. Ya, i m a bachelor and I m looking for a rich girlfriend/ wife.  There is one proverb which i find rather meaningful.  "Having a rich wife will lighten your workload for 10 years."  That is why I keep searching for that super rich girl who will take care of me.  I seriously dun mind being a househusband to look after the kids or something, certainly dun mind people calling me "eating soft rice"  Who cares about names calling if you can really live comfortably for the rest of your miserably short one life.  If you got a super rich gf or wife that can take care of you for the rest of our lives, everyday our job is to tour the world n shop shop shop.  For me, I dun shop. She can save that for hers.  Feeding me is so extremely easy.  Thus, I welcome all interested rich females to come forward to contact me.  My requirements is simple, RICH, PRETTY, CAR, MONEY, FOOD, HOUSE.  You must be saying I m a guy with no backbones.  Heck lah!  No wonder all guys die younger than the females.  All work so hard for the money, in the end the girls spend it all away.  Being a guy is super tiring sometimes have to handle all the burden of holding the family together...Be a girl, must be pretty n sexy, if not seriously as good as  being a guy.  My younger brother was "forced" to get married.  I dun want to be like him to be in that situation.  But he is super responsible person in every way seriously n i have super respect for him.  He is an engineer currently, has a good wife n super super adorable niece of mine.  But seriously, he work so hard to keep the family together n all the income all channel into the household.  Seriously, i feel so heart pained for my young bro sometimes n to feel relieved i was not married yet to feel all this stressful burdens.  My bro is seriously a good man n i prayed that the company can see his dedications n treat him well.  Getting married is no joke.  You need lots of money n readiness n commitment, a good wife/ husaband.  Ya for my case, a rich girlfriend first at least of cos......Thank you.  My new year's resolution. =)

18th January 2008

My reservist Unit 608 SIR Standing down parade - Getting ready to MR.

Me shaking hands with my superior officer to receive the certificate of Appreciation.  He also very happy he is going to MR soon.  I love u guys!   You  see the guys behind laughing so happily. LOL!

Before I start this entry..I need to seriously exclaim this.  Our Singaporean Army is one of the most comprehensive n high tech army in the South East Asia.  Our air force also top the chart in this region.  We are well-trained to eliminate any hostile invaders that disturb the peace n cohesion in the region n vouch to defend our Singapore till to our last drop of blood.  Every Singaporean Male/ Citizens are required to serve their their national service (NS) upon turning 18.  It is legislative and anyone can be charged in court for not serving.  Those who disobey superior orders or rude to superiors will be court martial n may have the chance to go to Detention Barracks and your hair will be shaved off like a criminals, and the strenuous training in DB will make you this life unforgettable.  I still remember one of my platoon mate scold his seargeant chee bye for punishing him doing push up just before ippt test chin up n he spitted on the ground.  He LL served the DB.  I m starting to love the food in army.  So yummy n healthy.  Got all meals, breakfast, lunch and dinner n sometimes supper if got night training.  Got even tom yum soup!!!!! n many many fruits!!!  I m super unhappy SAF reject my application to be a soldier recently.  Is it i m too old to join??  I really keen in joining the OCS leh.  if it is the case, i must blame myself for not joining earlier.  Army pays well, give u food with a standard compensation scheme that will not lose out to any of the private sectors.  They also give u free exercises n stuff.  Wake you up to do morning run, SOC and ippt.  I personally hate the SOC.  I will wet in my pants before any SOC run.  Standard Obstacle Course is the most strenuous thing I have done in my NSF life.  Everyone curses n swear it! Even today, i think of it, i dun want to think about it.  Hear the SOC name, my leg will tremble.  But army got its pluses, u meet people from all walks of life.  Some are very crazily on the ball, some run away from arrows, some hide in toilets during arrow shooting.  I admit I m those crazily on the ball most of the time because they paid me to do national service, so i have no much complaints.  But if the exercises are getting so tough n killing, I will really curse n swear the mountains and enemies we are climbing and "killing".  Yes, I was from Infantry but turned guardsmen i supposed.  I m now moving to Military reserve...From my knowledge, if really war erupts, the younger and fitter ones will go first to defend.  We are the reserve batch to be mobilized.  I will kill any enemies, bayonet them, put a bullet thru their head who try to invade our country, take our property or rape our women!  Yes, I m in combat unit n i m super fit.  I strongly urge all young SIngaporeans to join the army now! dun waste your time outside....If you want to own a house of ur own fast, buy a decent car, have a stable income, save lots of money, good food, free lodging, SAF is definite your choice..... JOIN NOW!

12th January 2008

We are all animals and we kill other animals to feed ourselves.  We are really cruel!

Cute tail wagging Puppy and PussyCat watching TV and my lousy ippt result!!!

Face it, people!  We n all other animals with hands n legs the same....We are all animals!!  I dun care about other scientist saying we are high-intellectual mammals.  We are all the same!!!  I strongly believe all animals do have emotions and temper.  I believe a penguin will laugh loudly at another bird who fall flat on the ground.  The dog will frown if another dog stare at him and will stare him back like a human beings.  And will fight if another dog try to seduce his or her partner.  It is just that nobody take the effort to teach them how to read and talk when they are born!  Yes..i certainly believe any animal can learn to talk and call you "Mama or Papa".  Since a baby can start yakking rubbish to converse in a full conversation, we should actually try teaching our pets to talk.  They will want to tell u how much they love you.....!  The best part is we even kill and eat animals.  Just like how a lion will catch n kill and eat his prey.  Guess how many cows n chickens we have killed every single day to feed all of us here..  How many ducks n pigs screaming in pain before death, with their heart still beating....thinking how come the thick blood will run out from the slit from their own bodies.  We are terrible aren't we?  Animals are not stupid.  They cried n yelled when they know they are going to be slaughtered.  They have cognitive ability comparable to human beings.  Wat will the world be like if we are the reared ones and are raised just to be part of a delicious cuisine.  We are no difference from any creatures.  See the terrier, it is so cute.  Trust me...this little fellow surely have greed for food n lust, like human beings, cos only animals have all basic emotions.  Wat if the cat is the ruler of this world, and his favorite food is human beings.  we are held in a prison hoping to be the last one to be picked to died..One by one, we are grabbed by the arm of the butcher.  Chop Chop Chop n become food for a cat.  This worst case scenario I hope will not happen.  We can never be kings forever.  We once used to be cavemen that only know how to "eh eh ah ah wu wu" till we invented communication skills.  We go dating, have dinner together n also encountered copulation along the way.  The animals have their own way of finding their soul mate, connect and love together, show a move or two.  Thus, kindly treat all animals with respect and equal.  No animals owe anyone their living.  If they happens to be in our food chain, just give them a easier n less painful death.  God bless...

Extra Comments: Last Year never train 2.4km run still can get silver.  This year never train, fail the test.  I m so stupid!  Screw up my very last ippt test!  Big disgrace! I have received an army letter saying I m not liable for any IPPT and Mobilisation practices/exercises after March. No more e-mart credits.  =(  No more seeing my old friends from army again. The food served now in army are excellent and extremely healthy.  Can you imagine, fish and chips dinner or chicken wing dinner (with little oil of cos)?!  We all received a Hamilton watch with our name specially craved on it to celebrate this final moments.  POP,  ORD is nothing.  This is the real deal.  The deal of getting old.  Double =(     608 SIR, u will all rock in my heart!

4th January 2008

Singapore's favorite Pioneer Comedian Actor, Jimmy Nah AKA MC King Dies Suddenly!

M C King seen here happily with well known actor Thomas Ong and FM100.3 well-liked radio host, Ye Li Mei. Moments treasured by good friends shall now only be kept in memories. Pic's source: MC King's Blog.

I was very shocked when someone MSN me that  M C King had died.  I cant believe it at all at first.  He is not that old yet (40s??) and he always appear to be very cheerful n youthful on TV.  I always keep wondering how come celebrity can keep their radiance for so long.  Till i read hardwarezone forums and channel news asia that he has really departed!  He has complained of breathing difficulties before rushing to the hospital.  Can you all believe life is so short???  One moment a person is here, the another moment he may be somewhere else n never return.  Just like our fathers and mothers.  We should really start to treat them really good from now on.

Just my opinion on this great comedian actor.  He is considered a pioneer on TV.  He has acted in many many dramas and seriously has his share of fame before. He mentioned in his blog saying he is not famous, I really doubt so.  Just that we have our ups and downs.  This is life!  Who does not know about M C King. Till now, I still can remember his funny scene with another guy at a hair salon laughing acting along with Do Do Ding Ye (Yan LiBing).  That scene was so funny and the images always appear in my mind.  I also remember him acting as a low-IQ guy in another drama.  His acting is superb I tell you and very convincing.  People does not feel that he is acting but really a real life character in the show.  I was alot younger then and me n friend always find him a very funny man, and we waved at him.  He waved back. That younger time when we meet him on the street and we feel very happy can see him.  I believe in reincarnation.  If he has a next life, I believe he will again bring laughers n his exciting acting to people again.  All i can say, Singapore has lost a very very great actor.  To many, a great friend.....

December 2007

THESE TWO YOUNG FEMALE PUNKS WHO PRETEND WANT TO TAKE PICS WITH ME BUT ACTUALLY MAKE NAUSEATE FACE N MAKE FUN OF ME BEHIND MY BACK!!!! QUITE BAD N HYPOCRITICAL!! I WAS PISSED!  IF I SMILE AT YOU REQUESTING FOR YOUR PIC, BUT END UP USE IT FOR BAD INTENTIONS.  THIS IS SIMPLY NOT RIGHT!  THEY GIVE U ONE SMILE AT UR FRONT, BUT STAB YOU WITH KNIVES AT YOUR BACK!   FINAL NOTE: IF YOU DO NOT GENUINELY SUPPORT ME, PLS DO NOT REQUEST ME FOR A PIC....GOD BLASTS!  I AM CONCLUDING THIS EPISODE OF MISCHIEF WITH THEIR APOLOGY.

3 pieces of evidences click here:

Evidence 1   Evidence 2    Evidence 3

Updates!!!! S wrote an letter of apology to Steven for her actions!  This is very admirable n nice gesture!! Kudos to S!

Click here for the letter

BELOW ARE MY REAL SUPPORTERS WHO PAID ME HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS TO INVITE ME AS GUEST STAR FOR 10 MINS PERFORMANCE AT THEIR PROM NIGHT. YA. YOU ARE RIGHT. I SING, HOT DANCE, PLAY KEYBOARD AND WRITE SONGS! FOR PERFORMANCE BOOKINGS, PLEASE CALL/SMS +65 93857300.

25th December 2007  2146hrs:    Merry Xmas Everyone & Happy New Year!!!!

Hey everyone......!!!! Today is Xmas Day??  How are all of you???  Hope you are fine!  Today i m lazy to go out...so many people in orchard!!! Squeeze here squeeze very irritating.  I was in Orchard last night and people purposely keep pushing me to go forward.  Some young punks lah....Fookers sia!  They want to move forward n want to sabo me to push the infront people.....Bet you met this kind of people before right?  And they use their body keep banging me.....Arrrgghh!! Angry lah... I stared at them....i m right...punks!  Orchard on Xmas eve says the phrase pack of sardines.....There are caroling n events at almost every shopping mall in Singapore...The onlookers are not only locals but also sudden surge of travellers from all over the world.  I see Indians, Caucasians and Arabs....All want to see how Singapore celebrate xmas.  Let me vouch, Singapore is very beautiful this xmas........Lights everywhere..so nice...! like stars watching upon the birth of Jesus Christ.

It is a time for sharing..people doing last min shopping at the extended opening time of malls.  Nice.......I love xmas.  I fantasize about peace, dove flying and mistletoes and presents.  I saw an auntie every funny yesterday.  Walking around with full loads of shopping, like a penguin, quack quack. Then, penguin fails down. Ouch! ahhahaha....so funny....I want to laugh but i think she is alright ba....She falls down make me want to go to the Northpole n suntan over there....The sun should be very bright over there...hahah..

Santa Claus is officially out of job.  There are virtually no houses with chimney here in Singapore.   If he have to come in, he has to climb thru the windows.  Ya.. i saw on news saying there are a few "Santa Clauses" that surprise kids this way.  But too bad, these Clauses have bad intentions.  They are robbers!  They bring ropes n knives and rape guys and girls...So beware of these unexpected visitors this festive season....Memorable...

Just now i try playing with the keyboard....it is fun.....i self taught myself keyboard.  Not very good..but at least got some comes out.  hey...you all dun know i can actually compose n write songs....serious!  I think i m good enuff....

People....hope you love me...i love you.....Regards, Stevie...muack!

9th December 2007  1700hrs:  Feedback for the government & Robberies experiences

Interview with blogbuzz.tv gorgeous host, Estee with my model, Ylva.  Pic with big boss of NuffNang, Mr.Cheo Ming Shen (red Nike shirt)! And the rest of the other celebrity bloggers n of cos CEO of Activechannel, Mr. Todd Murray.  I guess he is more than a millionaire...He bought a house in Sentosa!  Very envious there are so many more richer people beside me.

Dear government,

I m a very loyal Singaporean that fully support the running party. You dun even have to guess which party i vote for in the election.  I m also a motorbiker for many years and I always like to do some shopping at City Square n makan at the prata shop near Mobil at JB.  The Prata is very nice and cheap and the Indians are very friendly and warm.  But, I simply could not understand how come the customs always jam for the motorcycle line.  Not little jam, jam like a long long long dragon all the way up the bridge.  The worst part is when I reach the jammed custom, it is "oh no" for me... Cant U turn and have to suffered the congestion and the most unbearable is many bikers still keep their engine on.  Since it is very congested, all the fumes all gathered around the area and wun dispersed. Imagine the jam could take up more than half and hour, it is so so smoky and the air pollution is really at its max.  We bikers seriously dun wanna die of lung cancer. We are like smoked ducks at the custom, sweating, smoky and more gates does not seem to open..

It will be great if you could kindly enforce a mandatory turn off the engine rules with some helpful leaders directing the motorbikers.  Trust me...With this turning off the engine rules, the painful journey of waiting will become more pleasant instantly.  Could u imagine???  Jammed already still very smoky....It is so terrible...Friday Nights and Saturday are really terrible...I really pity those customs officers in the box, they are not even wearing a oxygen tank mask..This kind of pollution should be kept to the mininal, as this is obvious hazardous cause to lung cancers..They are working hard, they should enjoy some healthier environment..So jammed..I believe this is the time Malaysians will return home..Especially Friday Night..Really can faint if you are a motorbiker on an anticipated trip to JB....If only, more gates can open....Will be more efficient rather than getting stuck with just a few gates.

My crazy friend told me that best join two foreign customs together into one...People needs to pass one custom since there are only arriving and departing.  Whoever side wants to tighten the security is also possible.  Checks also can be conducted. Security is very important  for sure and i really applaud the government for doing their part in national security.  Thank you.   Sincerely, Steven

Dear readers,

Cathy Movie tickets at city square is very cheap. Approximately around SGD$4.40  for every day I think.  I always go there and watch movie.  The theatre environment is almost the same as Singapore one.  Grand, comfortable seats.  Though just a bit troublesome to travel to JB.

JB is relatively a safe place now with more police petrol on the street, compared to 2 3 years ago.  I still remember a few years ago, I was on my honda phantom motorbike fetching my friend home to Singapore at the U turn overhead bridge towards the Malaysian custom.  A motorbike with two people on it approaching us from behind at an acelerating speed.  To avoid any collision, I do a little dodge to the right side when it almost speed past us.  But something happened, its passengers, a malay guy stretched out his right hand to snatch the handphone my friend was holding at his left hand.  The handphone so lousy still wanna snatch! Bad taste!

Luckily i did the dodge and my friend do a funny scream, ":Eeeyer"... and tugged his hand in.  But the scariest part is they tried to kick with their right legs to overturn my small bike.  Damn angry!! and i tried to kick their bike as well.  But we both missed luckily or we both will skidded.  This is our second time we encountered a robbery.  The first one in Kuala Lumpur, both our expensive handphones and few hundreds ringgits are all robbed and they left us something like 10 ringgits each person.  This is one story I will not dare to reveal fully to anyone ever, cos it is too embarrassing. Details cant mentioned sorry. Guys, remember, dont fall for pretty girls over  there easily.  It may be a trap! But i was crazy that time..I suggested to my same friend to went back to confront them to get back and beg to return us our SIM card which are very important. And i told him if they dun want to return, we will fight with them  But the 8 -10 guys denied anything and they grabbed the guy on the street that exposed them to us and they beated him till he cant recognize home and face all swollen and they invited us to go to the room...  No thanks..I afraid cant enter, cant come out..N my stupid friend went inside with them and he saw more beating of the guy....Forget it, i dun want my SIM card anymore.  End of story

3rd December 2007  0238hrs:  Funny Jokes

I came across these few jokes in internet and I really want to share them with you.  Some are really dirty jokes and some are even more lame than me. LMAO! (Laugh my ass off!)  Yeah..they are funny...some got me laughing till my tears rolled down till my the knee like waterfall..  Here goes, darling...

The hairless Lodger

A couple take on an 18 year old girl as a lodger. She asked if she could have a bath but the woman of the house told her they didn't have a bathroom and she could use a tin bath in front of the fire.

"Monday's the best night, when my husband goes out to play darts," she said.

So the girl agreed to have a bath the following Monday. After her husband had gone to the pub for his darts match, the woman filled the bath and watched as the girl got undressed. She was surprised to see that the lass didn't have any public hair and told her husband when he came home.

He didn't believe her so she said: "Next week I'll leave a gap in the curtains so that you can see for yourself"

the following Monday, while the girl again got undressed, the wife asked: "Do you shave?"

"No," said the girl. "I've just never grown any hairs down there. Do you have hairs?"

"Oh yes," said the woman and she showed off her great, hairy mooff. When the husband got back in, she asked: "Did you see?" "Yes," he said. "But why the hell did you have to show her yours?"

"Why," she said. "You've seen it all before."

"I know," he said, "but the fucking darts team hadn't!"

Ah Lian drives car!

Ah Beng bought a Honda VTI recently and drove to Ah Lian's place to show it to her.
So there Ah Beng was bragging the various functions of his new car to his girlfriend.
"This is ah, so fast even the Mata Chia cannot catch ah!"
"Ha! Really ah!!! Steady lah!" said Ah Lian.
"Some more hor, this is Automatic one, vely easy to drive!"
So Ah Lian said, "Let me try! I wan, I wan!"
So Ah Lian took the driver's seat and shifted the gear and floored the accelerator.
The next moment, the car sped backwards and crashed into the lamp-post.
"Alamak! What u doing? U Siao Char Bo! U see lah! Wah Piang eh!" screamed Ah Beng.
"Solee, solee, pai sah lah! No lah, I tot hor, "R" for racing mah!"

22th November 2007  1500hrs:  Two Boys fighting, Alien disturbs  (Fiction)

Bobby was beating up Tommy.  Tommy's mouth bleeding...Bobby grabbed him on his collar..Tommy tries to punch Bobby's eye.  He missed the first time, he box Bobby another time.  Orh Bak Kut!  Bull eyes!  Bobby's left eyeball punctured, n almost drop out, dangling outside his eyelid.  Bobby tries to hold it to fix it back.  But Tommy boxed him in the right eye.  Two eyeballs now dangling outside, n Bobby now hold them with two hands.  He yelp.  Ouch Ouch...My balls!!  Tommy was very angry that Bobby always bully the ugly people. He walked up to Bobby, while Bobby was busy figuring a way to fix back his eyes,  he kicked Bobby at the groin area.  This time, Bobby's that part wun dangle anymore....Roti Prata I like..!

Suddenly,  a spaceship comes, hovering above them.....the door opened.  An alien standing near the door, shouting behind him..."Lower, lower, lowwer....Aiyah!"  He slipped n fell off the door...Roti Prata Kosong~!  The flattened alien pointed his middle finger at the spaceship...." Fucking Door!"  The alien was struggling to get up.  Bobby still tries fix his eyes.  He fixed wrongly, his left eyes up side down....He knocked his head to adjust...Cannot..must take out again...He dig out his ball again....Alien gets up n walked to Tommy.....The Alien is from Venus....His name is called Louis Chang.

"Why you bully friend?"  "He bullied me, idiot!"  "Why you bully friend?"

Tommy was getting very irritated, he gives the alien one tight slap!  "Shut up lah...keep asking the same question"  "Why u bully friend?"  Tommy decided to give the son of the bitch a DDT!  Roti Prata third times...

"Why you bully friend?"  "KNN, kao bei ah!"  Tommy kicks him repetitively  "Ask again, ask again!"  "Why you bully friend?"

This time, Tommy was super pissed off.. He climbed up the corners of the ring, n intend to give him super flying finish.  When he climbed halfway, he slipped.  The rope entangled him, with the legs super entangled, his head up, n his eyes staring in a super weird position.  "KNNNB.......Sibei suay...Kena bullied, stupid alien comes n disturb....Now become like Spiderman..."

Alien walked right to him, took out his laser gun.  Zap.....Chow Da........!  BBQ wings i like...yummy!

09th November 2007  2307hrs:  Running Away from Home  (Fiction)

Linda did it again.  She ran away from her home again.  Her Step father did her once again.  He had raped her many many times.  This is not the first time Linda has run away from home, in tears.   Tears was flowing out from the sides of her eyes.  She was running..... yes, she was running away from her house.  She wants to tell her mother about this, but she knows her mum wun believed in her.   Her mother thinks she got the most wonderful man in the world since Linda's birth father died in a car accident.  George was Linda's father best friend.  He came in at the right time n stole her heart again.  But her step-father is a bastard!!!!  Linda has the gut feeling George wants her mother's body n the big money issued out by the insurance for her father's death.

She felt so dirty after the sex.  Which father will rape their own daughters!!!???  Her mind are spinning.....She feel like committing suicide.  She was looking at the pond at the park.  Some ducks are looking her.  Some tilting their heads like dogs...trying to find out what is she going to do. 

Duck A: Is she going to jump??  Duck B: Not sure leh..you ask her lah...    Duck A: Oei Girl... Quack Quack Quack Quack...Oh sheep. I cant talk human! 

Finally, Linda decided...She is.....NOT going to jump into the pond.     Duck A & B: Chey!!! Waste out time!   Duck A: Tot of buying some popcorns just now! now no need le lah! Idiot girl! Want to jump dun dare to jump.Waste our time..make us feel so excited for nothing!.

Linda in despair, she does not even have the courage to jump into the 1.3m duck pond.  (For your info, Linda was 1.2m tall) LOL...Tears started to fall down from her eyes again....They streamed down to her mouth, then some to her nose...mixed with some mucus flowing down....Soon her face was covered with mucus n tears...just like after shower! =)

Linda started to run again.  This time, running away from the park.  The wind just slide past her...She is running towards you.. Linda is coming..!!!

"Oh my god! Linda is coming.." said the slow snail.  "She will crush me......Erkks.. "  Crack.....silence......death cry...

This is the time when Linda feels like she ran like Alice in wonderland, she paused n catches her breath.  Pant Pant Pant pant pant Pant pant.. Alice looks at her watch...630pm...She had ran away from home for 20 mins already..." Oh sheep, I must get back home...George may be worried..."  Linda's life continues...... 

Steven note:  just a story...Just bought a kawasaki Ninja ZX11  (1100cc) ....very very powerful class 2 indeed! Riding a bike may be dangerous, but really...it is super shiok!!

25th October 2007  0014hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 11

Inspector Xiaxue was laying beside Detective Steven.  She cant sleep. This is not the time she had killed a criminal. But today is different..she saw his parents..crying over.their only son...

"why did u kill him? He is not a criminal.He wun rob a bank!" his mother burst into tears.."He is such a good son! Boo hooo hoo!" she cries...the father can only drop tears of sorrow...  She could have shot him one more time at his legs to stop him . She blamed herself for that but if she never shoot him dead, she may be the one killed. He got a gun in his hand! Watever, the criminal is dead. Xiaxue is feeling feverish...Steven woke up seeing her in despair...

 "Are u ok, darling?" Seeing his girlfriend in a sickly look, he placed his hand on her forehead, rubbing his sleepy eyes with another. 

"oh man...u r running a fever.." He jumped up of bed n went to get a glass of water for her...n a Panadol pill on his hand..

 Xiaxue tried to crack a joke.."ha ha, u sure u giving me the rite pill? ITS AINT NOT VIAGRA right? Ha ha.."

 "Not funny... VIAGRA is for me..recently. I cant steam.."  he gave a cheeky sad face....

 "no worries..darling.. U r not that bad."

 "Thanks..wat u say really makes me feel better..."  They hugged sweetly..suddenly a red figure float pass xiaxue..she was shocked..but remained undisturbed.. It turns around with glaring fury eyes. It is Ali! It is coming back to haunt her! 

Next day, she was on mc with a temp of 39 degree celcius..first moment she woke up,  It stands right infront of her.

"arrgggh....! Ghost!" It glares at her! Then, stretches out his fire hands on to her.. Strangle! Strangle strangle! Xiaxue cant breathe..

 "sSSSS..SSST..stop!" It grasbs even tighter..Xiaxue's neck with her desperately holding on to its burning red hot hands, burning her hands too

 "Why did u kill me?! Who is going to take care of my family!? I must kill u" Xiaxue is dying soon...

 "oh Lord oh father above..! Forgive my sin! Give him patience n tolerance...If my life can give him peace, take me with u"

Suddenly, thru the window..a huge flash of light zapped in n almost vaporize Ali.. 

It turns totally into steam..cchhhssss! Xiaxue can only says her Grace in shock on bed...! GHOSTS really exists!

16th October 2007  0109hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 10

Did Inspector Xiaxue die???  No..... She is alive n kicking!  She is busy kicking bad ass in Modash again after refusing to stay in hospital bed for one month!!! She knows her wound on her back is still aching.. Sometimes it still bleeds a bit n pus may leak out occasionally from the hospital  bandage.  She does not seem to care.  In her eyes are only justice, just like Detective Steven Lim.  The longer sick leave they take, they going to work more overtime to get the criminals or solve crimes.  Police is just like office job but even more demanding!!!  A crime not solved means that more people may get hurt or unprotected!  Steven n Xiaxue knows that.  They are heroic crime busters.  They wun admit defeat.  Here it is, a Black man ran out of a convenience store, with a gun with a bag of money on his left hand.  Xiaxue was chasing him across the streets.  They jumped thru hurdles, misses near car accidents.  They are both now running.  Xiaxue was joined with more n more heroic civilians.  Wat a scene!!!  "Catch the robberer! Break his legs!!" Many yells u can hell.........a flock of people chasing a desperate, hungry man.  This guy is Ali.  Ali grown up at the poorest part of village Nila.  He is 43 years old, single, has never eaten abalone before, never tried sex before.  His father was old n sickly in bed.  His mum was blind.  He is only the sole bread owner in his family.  He lives in attap houses.  The whole area will be flooded once there are heavy rains. Yes, the frogs will even jumps in.  Snakes will follow.  Ali is pathetic.  He has never gone of his village before.  He is going out now to find food n more money for his family.  He stole a gun n too his chances at the town.  Not long after, he found himself chased by Xiaxue n a gang of angry streethelpers.  He needs to get away..He thinks..he needs the money for his sickly father...He going to treat his mum's eyes....  They barely left with bones....due to malnutrition...

After running for 1 mile...He could not take it anymore...By then, a hand grabbed his collar from his bank... An young lad attempts to stop him from getting away. try wrestle him to the ground.  "No...I cant be caught. My family needs me...!" Ali turns around matrix styled....Bang!  The young lad mouth opened big big...part of  his lips was shot thru...his teeth....n a bigger patch of his back skull when the bullet drew a hurricane movement all the away thru his head. Slow Mo....Young lad mouth wide...Head till aside.  Mouth leaks abit of blood........More blood flowing....then a big water fountain flows right from his back of his head.  Slow Mo...He......Is......Dead..  He is only 17.  He is a virgin.  Ali is a virgin killer........!  Now u must be wondering...Ali is so cruel to murder him....But if u were Ali, will u get urself caught???  The answer is yours.  Xiaxue skidded past thru him...n drop to see how is he.  She turns to the coming crowd n shook her head in despair, n on her kness again, she start chasing Ali....

Ali's mind thinks of only one thing..  Money, food, medicine cure!  He can almost see his family in his head.  He thinks of how his family are used to be when they are younger.  They are once very happy.  His mum will always push Ali on the swing when he is 5, 6 years old...His father will retired to their house after a long day in the sun ploughing n farming..His father used to be very mascular n his Pop will always flew him like superman across the hallway...zoomm...!  They were very poor...but they were very happy....Ali's eyes starts to tear....tear drops flew right past at the corners.  He starts running faster n faster......Run, Ali run......!  Xiaxue is losing him...This crazy Ali who has just killed a man is running faster n faster.....

She has license to shoot if needed.....  She grabbed his handgun clumsily from his gun pouch at his ankle n still running...She shouted... " Do not move.or i will shoot now!!!"  Ali knew that he had shot dead a guy..He worriedly look back at Xiaxue to check on things.  But he still run....  "I Said Dun move...I count to 3..... 1! Bang!"  "Sorry...I failed in maths...." Xiaxue said.......Ali was shot at his big right thigh.  Blood is like sperms flowing out of it....Ali shouted! Noooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!  Before he dropped to the ground, Matrix styled he flipped back again n flick a shot at Xiaxue...Before he can even squeeze the trigger,  "Bang..."  Ali left eye shot......"Bang!"  Right eye......"Bang...!" some meat of his forehead starts to fall..Ali knew his time was up...."Sorry Ma, Pa...I could not take care of u anymore...Good bye....."  Ali died a virgin......after 43 years!  He should have given it to that plump girl that liked him in College 20 years ago...

Some people said they could see tears at his eyes.   Ali dies without able to see his parents for the last times...Who is the real murderer in this case now?  Ali or Xiaxue....???  Do come back next time....as.....Ali relived.....!!!!!  Xiaxue and Steven will be in serious trouble...

4th October 2007  0243hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 9

Inspector Xiaxue turns around....A knife stuck at her shoulders...A burly, unshaven man grabbed her from behind at the neck with one hand n push Xiaxue aside...Xiaxue turns weak, black out n falls like a sack of potatoes.  "Xiaxue!!!!" Steven shouted n want to rush to her side but promptly blocked by Burly man.  Burly man looks at Detective Steven n looked at his friend's bleeding mouth with fallen teeth on the ground.  He stared at Steven.  Steven stared back......Steven is not afraid.  he is just 10 cm away from the filthy smelling creature.  Burly Man test punching his fist at his left palm.  He wants to fight! Steven was very worried about Xiaxue.   Will Xiaxue die? Cos she is bleeding so much...the floor is full of blood. ..Steven Lim tries to squeeze thru.  Burly man was super big n 2 heads taller than Steven.  Burly man neck locked Steven with his arm when Steven Lim tries to go pass thru his armpit.  Steven Lim is like a chicken head protruding out of Burly man's big arm lock.  Burly man tries to bring Steven lower n Man stretches out his right hand to the knife on Xiaxue's back n extract it out...the blood was flying around n spilling....bleeding so much....all red on the floor..Man tries to stab at Steven. Steven Lim tries to break free and wanting to rush to Xiaxue. He loves her.  "Xiaxue....dun die..u so young...dun die!!!" His heart said...there was a big struggle....Two stabs miss.   The third one hits on Steven's head.. The knife does not have any effect on him, as the knife excruciate n bounced off from Steven's head like rubber..Burly man does not believe it, he stabs a few more times on Steven's head.  the knife simply twists n broke into two.  Burly man was shocked n threw away the knife in disbelief as he had just seen a ghosts.  He punched Steven on the head again like an American wrestler.  No effect n he even feel the pain on his fist as it get bruised from the bionic powers of Steven.  Steven grabbed Burly man's belt.  With his shoulder, he knocked Burly man to the ground.  Burly man struggled n crawled backwards..He had seen the ghost!!!  Steven chased him n grabbed hold of his leg when he intends to move away.  He tried to kick free but Steven only hold it even tighter. Steven lifts the whole man up to his shoulder level like a chicken waiting to be slaughter.  Flying chop left to right with his left hand, the leg is wasted, the bone is twisted n deformed, finally dangling with the meat, it becomes two piece.  Foot n ankle on Steven's hand, the body just dropped on the floor... "Arrgggghhhh!!! Arrggghhhhhhh!!!"  Burly man just shouted in pain n seeing his foot on Steven's hand just freaked him out.  His broken leg just waved frantically in the air, like seeking for help.  Steven walked over again, He lifted the evil guy's left hand, vertical kick, from bottom to top, two broken limbs in total. Chopped foot on his right hand, the broken n bleeding hand on his left hand.  In one motion, he threw the two missing pieces back to the Burly man at the chest...  "Arrrggghh  Arrggghhh!! Arrggghhh!"  Burly man screamed, cant decide on wether to take or not take the chopped off.  Police vehicles came.  The siren noise shook the empty beach..Burly man n his accomplices were apprehended.  Steven rushed over to Xiaxue....."Xiaxue....Dun die..dun die.."  He hugged her really tight..."Dun die.." He cries. Tears rolled streamingly without any control..Everyone can see the sadness in his eyes..She is still breathing..Ambulance came n rushed her to the hospital.........Will Inspector Xiaxue dies?  Wat happens next time will be a shock.....!

23th September 2007  0138hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 8

Aliens were destroyed n eliminated last week.  Peace was brought back to Modash.  Road sweepers n the army was busily removing all the debris n dust on the street.  The aftermath of using a Nuclear Bomb.  You could see aliens heads, arms n legs around n many parts of them are bloodied n minced, laying awkwardly everywhere on the street.  The citizen of Modash were thinking.  After this alien's invasion, wat could be worse??  Inspector Xiaxue & her beau, Detective Steven Lim was playing around on the beach.  They were playing with water, some catching, frisbee, fetch & some hide n seek.  A lazy Monday afternoon, off day for the very young couple.  Hahahhahaa.... Steven was laughing....Heehee hee hhee... Xiaxue's giggling...n they hug sweetly when the day becomes dusk.  They decided to go for shower after a long hot day in the sun.  It was a fun day, n they really enjoy the good times together.  They took their things n hand in hand, they strolled to the toilet.  Xiaxue was dragging her foot.  She had hurted her left foot when she run over a sharp pebble. Yah...everything was slow n easy.  Steven entered the gents n Xiaxue to hers. There were not many people at the beach on Monday.  There are many available shower heads in the Ladies.  But some noise at the toilet cubicle attracted her attention.  There were some deep voices, most prob from a guy's coming out of there.  "Sshh..u better shut up.  Pass me all ur cash, or i will stuff this knife your mouth."  Robberies??! Xiaxue knocked on the door.  "Is anything ok inside?"  There was complete silence as her voice echoed in the empty toilet.  Further silence.  She knocked the door again.  She hold her breath, trying not to disturb the silence there.  "Hello! U ok?? can reply?"  No response....  Xiaxue  jumped up to see what is inside.  2 guys, stared at the jump, each holding a knife at the throat of a undressed terrified Caucasian girl.  This is bad.  Rape Robbery? "Police! Put down your weapons or I will use force!"  Xiaxue tried to jump again to peek.  Suddenly, the door slam opened n banged the flying Xiaxue away to the ground.  She fell.  The two criminals holding on to the knives at the girl's throat, sizzled out from the cubicle.  Seeing Xiaxue unarmed, one tried to seize Xiaxue.  Xiaxue was unprepared. She screamed like a woman.  Steven heard the scream n immediately wrap a toilet n rushed to over to see wat happened. Two girls are taken hostage.  There are surrounded by by-passers. One of the hostages is a senior police inspector!  How bad can it be?  Steven rushed back again n took his gun, pointed at the two criminals.  They are holding on more tightly to their knife.  "You better dun be stupid, or i do a cut on her throat."  "Put down ur knifes, I say!"  "Dare to try us?!"  One did a small cut on Xia xue's throat...zip...tiny blood flows out..... Oh my god...  Should Steven put down his weapon???  He lowered his gun but immediately point back at them again... " I say put down your knifes, if not i will really shoot!"  Xiaxue is looking for a chance...yes, her throat starts bleeding a bit......She signaled with his eyes.  It says shoot the another one.....Steven got the message...  He shoots!  One criminal was shot at his throat.  Gone...he is down..The naked Caucasian girl try to flee...Another one that is holding on to Xiaxue tries to get her back.  Xiaxue elbowed back his chest.  Kapow!  The guy in pain! Vomit blood.  Vertical kick to his chin...Poof!  He somersaulted back with the attack n dropped to the ground.  His knife dropped beside him.  He tries to get up again n take the knife.  Bang! Bang!  Steven shots his hand....Blood......a lot of blood....his index finger was shot off.....Ahhhhhhh!! Pain.....!!  The criminal holding on to his right hand...  Steven passed his towel to the Caucasian to cover herself, n with his swimming trunk, he ran over....He flew....Knee cap flying kick...Left to right swing....The criminal face turns funny n distorted.. all sets of teeth on the right side all drop.... Suddenly,  Xiaxue felt a sharp pain on her right shoulder.  A knife was stucked there....She turns around.....Someone is there....Wat actually happen??? Another criminal??? Do come back soon again to find out............

15th September 2007  1138hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 7

The commandoes was sent in by the choppers with missiles.  100 sets of helicopters were flying underneath the big alien flying spaceship, awaiting new orders to attack it.  This is going to be a big space war.  How many aliens they have inside the spaceship?  Detective Steven ponders  He is put incharge as the back room command of the whole operation.  He has just been awarded a medal for his bravery in eliminating two aliens from the previous chapters.  Two were beheaded.  Now the problem is that they have no clue on how to enter the ship.  They cant attack just like that.  The falling debris may just crush Modash.  It is a long wait for the big fight.  Martians against Earthlings!  1247 hrs  Movement in the spaceship.  It shift places to the east 5 km.  At the top of Mount Ferlicia, the big spaceship doors opened slowly nosily.  Chump Chump Chump.  Heads popping out again, but now with laser gun like weapon in hands.  The metallic door slams hard on top on the mountain.  One bigger alien stepped out with a gun on his hand.  With a wave, a roar....... "Charge.....!!!!"  Two lines of aliens rush out thru the door, running down fast the hill.  Aliens attacking!!!  It is a magnificent thing.  The war cry is frightening...." Charge Charge Charge...!! Destroy Earth....!!! Kill all!!!!"   They started shooting at the helicopters. Zap Zap.....rotary blade of the choppers exploded....crashing down like paper airplanes in flames.  Boom.....Two crashed down below.  It is very messy.  The helicopters just crashed on some people.. "Fire the opening door!!! before it is close......The alien lines never stop....More n more aliens speed out from their nest.  Missiles was shot inside the door.. Zoom Zoom zoom... Zoom.. Exploded.  The whole space ship shook!  They are many confusion inside.  They never expect Earthlings do have powerful missiles weapon.  President JeevKid, "Feed them some nuclear.....Make sure it flew rite in...No mistakes"  Nuclear!!"  Nuclear loaded, the fighter pilot nervously take aim at the opening door.  Shoot rite in, he said.  Locked. He pressed the button.  Zzzzaaaaapppppp......At first there are nothing....but boom!!!!!!  The whole space ship expanded, started to crack then till it cant contain anymore.   Boom......Nuclear cloud was formed inside the spaceship...!!! Can u imagine how bad it is!!!?? The aliens who are still inside....Melt like ices in hotpan.  You cant even find their bodies!!  The ones near the door were thrown out by the explosion n you could see many of them rolling down the steep hill by collateral damages.  Inspector Xiaxue was at the bottom.  She ordered!!   Shoot them.....Machine guns start aiming at the rolling n terrified aliens.  The aliens are helpless.  They could not turn back.  The spaceship disappeared totally.  Only dust of it keeps flying around..  There are about 200 of the aliens with aliens still surviving.  Those that struggled to get up at the bottom to shoot back were shot at every parts of the bodies.  More struggled.  Only 100 left n they charged towards the police.  2 went past the defense line.  Steven was there....  With two hands, grabbed n lifted both of them up at the neck n smashed the two small heads together.  Piak!!!! Mini explosion...Brain dead!  N he uses them as rocks n flung them at the attackers.  One hit one miss.  One more instant death upon the hit.  Steven rushed to one remains of the helicopters lifted the burning big choppers up.....  Up Up Up above his head n with a 270 degree turn of his body, he flicked it easily at the aliens again.   Aliens were screaming.  They never knew Earthlings can be that terrible n so strong.  They all tremble with fear n gathered together.  Many are shot n injured badly.  A few aliens were shot in the eyes n gone blind n some half head gone.  They lifted hands n surrendered n all kneel down.  Steven walked in with his comrades with guns.  Suddenly, one alien tried to attack one cop.  With super speed, Steven goes over, a kick from rite to left.  Headless.... Like soccer, the head undetached from the main body, flew n hit a police car.  The police car exploded with the impact.  Powerful Detective Steven Lim!!!  All surrounded with weapons thrown aside.  50 left...  All were locked up n the leaders were sent for further investigation n interviews.  Again.....Detective Steven Lim & Inspector Xiaxue saved the Earth again!  More actions next episode!!

8th September 2007  0226hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 6

Sky was dark....People of Modash was looking up to the sky.  It was rather unusual.  It is not going to rain.  It is not cloudy but there is  something up there up high up in the sky that blocks the sunlight.  It was very big, very very big.  "Wat the fuck is that!" a citizen exclaimed.    Besides, it was hovering n floating high above n wherever it goes, it blocks n give a dark shade to the land below.  Police was long being informed n everyone was pointing n discussing about the big UFO.  Inspector Xiaxue n Detective Steven Lim was there too.  Steven was scuffling his dark hair back with his rite hand, with another hand palms outwards placing on his head.  "Oh my god.....it is getting closer!"  True enough, it is getting bigger n bigger......It is half the size of Modash when it stopped suddenly 100m above from ground.

The door opens, slamming down in midair.  Many many little heads were seen behind the door.  Aliens! Yikes!!  Aliens invasion?!!!  Two aliens jumped out from the door n float down to the ground. They land infront of Xiaxue n Steven whose mouth opened big in shock.  Friends or Foes?  One pointed a finger at Steven's cheek.  " I want to talk to your top leader..." Damn! Steven thinks, really Alien invasion this time!  He shivered abit....Not because he is afraid he will lose in fighting.  He is worried about the massive aliens invasion to the whole city.... His parents n family n Xiaxue who is not super powered.... " Ok ok..i bring u there..."  No one dares to move an inch.....Any false moves, alien invasions....Bye bye Modash...

President JeevKid's Office

"Er...wat do you all need..? What is your purpose here???" " Our home planet is destroyed.  We want to borrow your chair.  or rather, give us your place.  If not, we will come down with massive destructive weapons n eliminate all of you before we have it all by ourselve."  "No way...u not going to take it!"  President look at Steven in a "what shall we do?" look.  "We, Martians, we will kill you all then!  I m making a call now to send down the troops.  Bye bye, Earthlings...ahhahahahhah!"  One took up a communication device n attempt to talk to it.

"No way!"  Steven chop off one head in one motion.  The head rolled down to the president table.  He squirmed!  Ahhh.....   No blood, Martians dun have blood.  The other tried to run..... the president security guards opened fire... Not one shots.  33 shots from top to bottom.  "EEEkk  Arrgghhh..." The alien left a painful scream then fell to the ground n crawl abit in pain then eyes open big died.  "Useless creatues!"  Detective Steven walks, n another motion he stomp into the heads.  The foot went thru all bones n skull crushes.....Cracks cracks.......Same....the body detached from the head....One headless body n the other not even better.  Roti Prata....

Oh my god...wat shall they do now?? send the commandoes to clear the spaceship with helicopters? or fighter planes??  They must not let the spaceship had a chance to unload its invaders, it not there is really no way back.  Two aliens were killed relatively easy.  Their communication devices keep beeping.   Maybe the rest of the aliens already know what had happened.  They may have guns or lasers....We are panicking.  wat shall we do??

Inspector Xiaxue heads the police department at the scene.  She was holding on to her binoculars n scouting the surface of the space ship.  The ship was white in color, with sunlight shines on it...it becomes golden n it is very irritating to open ur eyes n spy the area.  She sighed in despair, thinking what will happen in the future.  She has no kin left.  It does not matter to her so much, but she loves Steven.  They are going to get married one day, hopefully before the end of the world. " Oh lord, pls make Steven safe n sound....." She prayed...

"Ladies n Gentlemen, this is ur President JeevKid here.  We are going to attack the ship no matter soon in one hour time.... Please close all ur windows n hide n wait for any updated news."  Next episode, there will b a hard core attack n adventures with Martians  For full story pls kindly wait for the story continues.....

28th August 2007  0428hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 5

It was not an accident.  Michelle was strangled to death while trying to protect her virginity...She was a young girl..She never gave it to anyone even though she had 3 boyfriends before.  She was a staunch Christian, n she wants to leave the best moments for her future husband.  Yes, She is a still a virgin but she is dead.  Those two bastards who attempted to rape her was put on trial in front of the subordinate courts.  In front of the judges a panel of jury n a packed audience to see this astonishing rape murder case.  Michael n Kenny Xia was handcuffed.  They are each manhandled by burly policeman by the arms...They faced a possibilities of death..  The pathologist again proved that the murdered, Michelle was strangled to near death before she was thrown out the window ruthlessly by the murderers.  Inspector Xiaxue n her beau, Steven Lim was there for the hearing. 

Suddenly, in the midst of the hearing....A sudden raving sound of an engine filled the room.  A big Harley Davidson motorcycle smashed opened the main door of the court.  The door was really exploding n all the presents are all shocked by the big sound!  A very big sized guy with big rifle guns n flower tattoo jammed brake the bike at the defendant stand.  Screeech..the bike fish tailed n turned n the bike was facing back to the entrance. The rifle pointing at the two guards behind them. Bam! Bam!  The heads of the guards explodes in midair, leaving only the necks n below parts, you could even see blood flowing out from the necks but u cannot find the head anywhere....They are gone!

"Michael, Kenny run!"  The two murderers climbed out of the cell n jumped rite on to the big bike.  There are 3 persons in the bike!  The 1900cc bike goes brooommzz..boroomm..s. broommmmmmmmmz..... to the direction of the main gate.  Xiaxue n Steven wiggled thru the terrified people on the grounds, they are going for the main door too.  At the door where the bike are heading..  Two figures jumped down from above the door to the level.  Yes, Inspector Xiaxue n Detective Steven! Both dropping to a Kung Fu Stance each.  Hi Ya!

"Knock them down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  "Just knock them down!"  The bike almost knocks into Xia xue... Xiaxue jumped aside n carelessly rolls on the ground n bounced back up again with superb flying kick that send the whole bike sailing thru space, side skidded before the walls n toppled over on the sides.  Michael's legs was busted with the whole bike crashing on his leg..He is immobilized! Kenny Xia tries to run out of the main to be blocked by Steven. 

Scenario......Xiaxue against Burly rider.  Burly rider drew out from the back of his jacket the big rifle n aimed two shots at Xia Xue.....Bam Bam!  One missed n the another almost hitted Xiaxue.   She kept dodging n took cover behind the judge table. Third shot! Bam! Crash!  The whole table vanished...N you can see Xiaxue n the judge trying to running for other covers...!  He kept shooting...Bam Bam to the hiding audiences....Few are already dead....Some got big holes in the body, with the hearts n lungs gone....some kidneys...

No more ammunitions!  Xiaxue bounced up n flew thru the space the again....knee lifted...Kepuit! Rider chin's receiving her knee cap.  Spit blood...He fell back to the ground..He bounced up....He bounced around like a boxer with a series of attacking boxing stances...Shoot shoot...Two jabs to Xiaxue's face.  She fell back to give him a vertical high kick to the chin again.  He flipped back this time.  Broken neck....!  He tries struggle up again.  KO......!  Xiaxue flew high up again, up up up then down fast to give him a spinning drill kick on top of his chest..... He needs to get his lung changed if he is alive!

Steven Lim Vs Kenny Xia...Blockage at the entrance.....He blocked Kenny.  Kenny tries to force thru to be wrestled on the ground by Steven.  There is no contest! Until... Kenny chants.... "oh flur aah ki ta mu ni lah......oh flur aah ki ta mu ni lah! oh flur aah ki ta mu ni lah! ..oh flur aah ki ta mu ni lah..!"  Something weird happens.....Kenny can morph!!!  Steven cant grab hold of him anymore.....Kenny's neck thickens, arms thicken n everything was becoming so big so big......He was three foot tall n his foot is  80"!  Steven get ready to defends..Kung Fu Stance Hiya!...Kenny's wields his big fist the on Steven! Thump!  Floor one big hole!

Thump Thump Thump!  Three big holes....!  Steven barely dodge the last one....He is a monster!!!!  Steven was forced to a corner.....He kicked his

 legs.....Kenny twitched n tripped...Good chance...Steven kick at the same spot....Kenny fell this time round.  N bounced back again... Thump Thump  Kick

Kick There is a big exchange of fights.  Out of nowhere, Kenny was holding a big chopper in his hand!  Danger!  Steven, finished him!  Kill this monster.....Detective Steven jumped up, with hands by his sides n flew thru the space, up up up till see Kenny's surprised face n side kicked...from right to the left...One big swing across Kenny's gigantic head!  It missed n Steven follow thru the spin with another kick. Kapoob!  n another spin  Kapow! Kapow Kapow Kapow Kapow again! Kenny Xia eyes goes blind n spits his dropping teeth out...N dropped..Panting...the mouth bleeding like mad....on his knees.....KO.....Steven Lim flew again, floating towards Kenny with fast speed.  A final vertical uppercut below the chin which goes right thru it actually.  The fist sticking in the mouth.  Kenny could not breathe...Kenny whine in pain..Arrrghh ...arrggh...Pain...Pant Pant! Pant pant.... His eyes ended wide opened....Pronounced dead..

Xiaxue n Steven comes together n they hugged n prayed n kissed...He grasps her hands n he passionately kissed her again.... Finally, it is over.....!

The only surviving criminal, Michael goes to the hanging area with a limping leg n a clutch...Come back next time, we have superpower action packed adventures awaits u....!

20th August 2007  0206hrs: Adventures of Inspector Xiaxue & Detective Steven Lim: Epi 4

"Thump, thump, thump!"  Detective Steven is in his bed.."Wat the hell!  When r they going to complete their renovation?"  Police works in different shift n hours.. He is trying to sleep in the day.  He looks at the alarm clock... 0305pm.. "Oh fuck! I cant sleep!"  On the light cupboard, is their picture in the frame.  Steven n Inspector Xiaxue.  They are lovers for many years...Knock knock....someone is knocking at the door....Steven dragged his tired feet to the entrance...It is Inspector Xiaxue.." How are u, honey...u sleeping?"  Xiaxue's hands are full of groceries..."Look at the food i buy for u.."  Steven gave her the "oh pls look...."  Xiaxue placed them on the dining table...Steven dragged himself back to sleep again... Do Not Disturb he says... LOL......Xiaxue sheepishly crawled to his bed, n pointed her finger at his head... "Lazy pig, sleep sleep sleep.." "Oh, pls give me a break...you are worse than the renovation above..." while Steven flipped to the other side...Xiaxue laid down beside him softly, n tried to nap a bit ..She placed her arms across Steven's waist n place her hands  on top of his...  Zzzzzzzz........

5.07pm   A large thump was heard.  It woke both of them up from the bed..Wat was that..?  Apparently a maid jumped down from her 7th floor owner's house.  The body was underneath.  Blood was everywhere....Her face all shattered n bloodied... Hmm... 7th storey????  It is the renovation flat....!!  The owners were working, leaving the maid to guard the house n handle the workers to renovate their living room floor... Now the issue is the maid  commit suicide for various reasons or it is foul play..??  They rushed down, Xiaxue n Steven with his pajamas n Xiaxue, investigate the situation.  "911! we have a case of suicide over here. send team over here.  Xiaxue here...."  They knew the maid.She was Michelle, a pretty n busty 21 yrs old girl from Thai.  They exchanged greetings before... They knew something was amiss. Her blouse was disarrayed n torn, even a few buttons went missing.  Her neck shown strangled marks.  They rushed up the storey n check on the renovation.  Only two renovation guys was there.  They r Michael Tan n Kenny Xia.  They keep claiming that they are busy with the dining room refurnishing n only heard of the suicide with the thump. 

Main thing.  Do you believe them?  Kenny Xia got scratch marks on his face.  3 faint lines of across.  A slap??? n Michael seems nervous, n nothing can hide his trembling fingers. An autopsy was performed.  They may be rite.  She was struggling first almost to near death n till coma n was finally thrown out the building n fall to death.  There are forced grab marks on her arms n wrists n especially the breasts area.  She had not been raped but there is obvious struggle n forced entry, as bruises was found at the legs area.  To inspector Xiaxue, it may be  case of outrage of modesty or even an attempted raped.  Now, Michael n Kenny were the main suspect in the scene but they got the same storey.  They are working on the tiles n they hear the jump.

Detective Steven pushed Kenny Xia against the wall with the chair.  " You fucking bastard, you better talk! You try to rape her rite!  They are no other people around but u n Michael.  You wun get away from this..I will beat the shit out of u.." "Sir, we really never rape her ...believe us, can..?" Kenny bowed low, shoulder in pain with the impact. Michael was terrified...."It was not me!! it is him who wants to do it...I tried to stop him...He said she was hot!" "Michael, wat you talking about! Asshole.  You grabbed her tits too rite!  Son of bitch, stupid give urself up..."

"Oh! finally both of you talk huh!  How do you kill her!"  It was attempted rape.  Michelle offered them drinks n walked in n out of the rooms.  Kenny got turned on. He grabbed her hand n pulled her towards his chest. She struggled n Michael assists.  They are bastards, they grabbed her breasts n played with her n they wants to force them to her.  She tried to run off again, kicking n scratching Kenny's face  When she wants to scream, Kenny struggled her... "Sshh shh..dun scream...".  They were terrified when s